


Prologue: No harm in changing history right?

by Firebog



Series: But Instead, We Become This [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Croatoan/Endverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-30
Updated: 2014-04-30
Packaged: 2018-01-21 09:05:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1545227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Firebog/pseuds/Firebog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You have well and truly lost it at last haven't you? Alright. I probably have something for that." </p><p>"No Cas. I haven't."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Prologue: No harm in changing history right?

**Author's Note:**

> Series Note: This series runs in conjuncture with the series [The Only Thing We Have Left.](http://archiveofourown.org/series/97772) However! You do not need to read that in order to read this. It will make more sense though because Cas is a terribly unreliable narrator- wonder where he picked that up from?
> 
> The links throughout this series connect to memories collected in the series The Only Thing We Have Left. So if you're clicking on a link in the chapter you're clicking over to a secondary story that takes place in the past/future.
> 
> Chapter Note: *I'm aware this happened later but I just like it.

"Demons, man. Every time." Dean said as he looked out over the city. He leaned back against the door of Cas's truck.

"Well, Fearless Leader, I think once you said that you were probably going to die tomorrow and I told you then, I'd go with you and try my best. Is it good enough*?" Cas laughed. They were supposed to be down there with the others but they had gone back to the burnt out collapsed church for some supplies. Good thing, since if they hadn't they'd probably be just as dead others by now.

"Yeah Cas. Sure." Dean said distracted. He clutched at something in his coat pocket.

Something about the more than usual fatalistic way Dean said that had Cas worried. It was as if Dean were contemplating suicide in that sentence. The end of the world and he was concerned about someone taking the easy way out? Ha!

"C-Cas?" Dean said.

Now he was actually more than a little worried. Dean's voice trembled. It actually fucking _trembled_. For a moment it was like before. Dean looked at him like he was more than a drug addled mortal angel with his powers still draining away. As if he were an Angel of the Lord. As if he were once again both terrifying and awe inspiring and could smite and heal with the same touch. A Soldier of Heaven capable of dealing out divine wrath or mercy.

"Cas. I'm sorry okay? I'm sorry about dragging you down into this shit hole. I'm sorry we didn't hook up until everything was shit. I'm sorry that I was an asshole and broke it off when you needed me. I'm sorry about...well about _all_ of it." Dean confessed, looking back across the city.

"Younger you really did a number on your head." Cas turned to look at him. Yeah, Dean was definitely going to kill himself somehow. Well that was okay. He had followed him everywhere else.

"Cas. I need you to fix this." Dean said, dead serious.

Cas laughed, "Right. I'll just wave my hands and cure the world."

"Nah. I think we're pretty fucked here. Sons of bitches pretty much killed everyone at this point I think." Dean waved a hand at the city. "Look. I have the Colt. Tomorrow I'm going to kill the Devil, but it won't make any of this right. It's just vengeance now. We lost the day Sam said yes. We've just been holding on by the skin of our teeth."

"I hate it when you get reflective." Cas said. He trailed his fingers up Dean's arm for old time's sake. Maybe Dean was down for one last hurrah before he did whatever it was he was planning on doing.

Dean caught his arm. He stuffed a handful of something into Cas's breast pocket and thrust the extra large duffle bag at him. The duffle bag they had gone back for. Dean took out his flask, it was full of blood. He splashed it across Cas.

Cas sputtered and wiped blood out of his eye. "You have well and truly lost it at last haven't you? Alright. I probably have something for that."

"No Cas. I haven't." Dean pulled out the thing in his jacket, [ a mason jar full of a dark liquid.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1545155) Dean started painting a sigil on the door of the truck with the liquid from the jar. He muttered the spell under his breath, then added "Hope this works, spell just said a door."

Cas clutched at the bag and his gun. He stepped away from the door and watched for a moment before he realized what Dean had drawn. "No. No, we're still in this together remember? _Always_. Here just-" Cas dug through his pockets awkwardly, still holding the bag and his gun. He pulled out a bottle of pills. "Here. These will calm you down and we can discuss killing ourselves in a rational fucking manner back at camp."

Dean grabbed his friend and sometimes lover by the arm. He pulled open the door to the truck. A crackling portal had suddenly appeared on the inside. "Sorry Cas. I can't fix this but maybe you can. I'm sorry okay? Just try to fix it. I need you to fix this."

"Dean! No!" Cas dropped the duffle bag as he tried to grab at Dean. Dean didn't bother to say sorry again before he pushed him into the truck. It occurred to Cas as he was falling that, that was the first time he had used Dean's name in almost a year.

Dean threw the blood spattered duffle bag after him and slammed the door. He waited thirty seconds then opened the truck cautiously. It was just Cas's truck now. No freaky time portal. No extra crispy Cas. He looked back out over the city. He had never told anyone that he knew this was all going to happen, not even his younger self. He knew he'd come here and see all this and still send Sam away and they'd be right back where they started.

He knew that tomorrow he'd use the Colt on Lucifer and that it wouldn't work. Everything had been one slow long march from 2009 to 2014. He had known how everything ended for the last five years. He didn't care anymore. He needed for this to be over and he was pretty damn sure that he had at last figured out how to break the loop. He'd send Cas back. Cas would fix it. He knew it. Yeah, tomorrow he'd still die, but on the plus side, at least that meant Cas couldn't use his younger self's blood and reverse the spell. He wouldn't be around for it to connect.

Hopefully Cas would fix it all.

He got into Cas's truck and headed back to camp. Past him was going to trash the place when he told him Cas hadn't made it. Maybe that would make the idiot say yes. No harm in changing history twice right?

**Author's Note:**

> Dean basically did a variation of the spell that Henry Winchester used. Why? Where would he have learned it? How would that work? Because I said so.


End file.
